Things John Says That Confuse Me

Really, these are things for which I have no good explanation.

patootie: I am a patootie. So is mamma. How we got this status is beyond me. Neither of us use that particular word. I could see 'touchis' or 'backside.' we usually just say 'butt.'

ghosts / monsters: OK, I understand that he's going to 'see' monsters and ghosts and stuff at his age. He will look into a dark room and say 'there's a ghost in there.' I say 'is the ghost happy or sad or angry?' He'll answer 'happy' and I say 'no problem then. if it's a happy ghost then just say hi ghost.' He looks back in and says 'hi ghost!' I'm confused because I'm not sure what to do if he starts saying that the ghost is angry or sad.

Addendum to 'monsters': Sometimes John tells us that he has monsters in his eyes. We ask if they're happy or sad or angry. I'm not sure how he can tell, but he knows.

doodie: this is another one that he didn't get from us. He also seems to understand the word in context, as in: 'You have doodie in your butt.' My confusion is in two parts (1) how did he know and (2) why is that so funny.

mackers: for macaroni and cheese. I don't know where he learned it, but it's cute.